Charisma, What Is it And How Do You Get It?

Most of us know someone who lights up a room when they walk in. They seem to have this wonderful aura about them and whenever you leave their company, you feel better for having met them.

But what is it about them that makes them shine? Is it how tall they are? How beautiful they are? How fat/thin they are? Or the clothes they wear? Absolutely not!

It is the mysterious quality of charisma. People who are charismatic are comfortable with who they are. They have no ego, so they don’t try to impress, dominate the conversation or try to change others minds. They are both interesting and interested, putting others at ease by radiating warmth, genuineness and kindliness.

Unflawed Beauty

We are often our own worst critics, when no-one else notices our slight imperfection, we are on it :). That tiny spot becomes a crater, those slightly loser arms, become bingo wings, those laughter lines become wrinkles.

But if you look around you, you will see it is not how beautifully unflawed people are on the outside that makes them attractive, but how beautifully unflawed they are on the inside. It is their confidence, their self belief. People want to talk to them and be their friend. They have a radiance that shines through their eyes. 

How You Make People Feel

It is not how you look or what you say that people remember, it’s the way you made them feel. If they walk away from you feeling elated, happy, valued, listened to, they will remember meeting you.

So how do you become charismatic? Talk to everyone you meet as if they are the nicest person you have ever met. Make them feel special. Find something nice to say about everyone you meet. 

Be interested in what people have to say. Ask questions, without being intrusive. Make eye contact and smile, often. 

Allow others to shine.

I used to teach a group of students who had been excluded from school. All of them had little interest in how they looked, or what other people thought. But every time I saw them I thought of something nice to say, and over the course of a year, their confidence grew beyond measure. It was a joy to watch.

Confidence is Key

If you want to be charismatic (and let’s face it, who doesn’t?) the key is confidence. Be self assured, but not over confident. Have humility, not arrogance. Be prepared to be vulnerable, but not pitiful. Ensure that the person you are talking to feels they are the most important person in the room.When you ask a question, give them time and space to answer. Be patient, be present, be kind.

Charismatic People

A good way to develop your charisma is to learn from others. Think of someone you know (friend, family, celebrity, etc) who is charismatic. What do they do that makes others feel special? Look at their body language, the way they smile, the way they stand.

Listen to the how they speak, the pitch, the intonation of their voice. Think of the words they say and how people respond. You will almost certainly notice their smiles, eye contact and their genuine warmth. 

And that is pretty much all you need :)

Thank you for stopping by💝💝💝 Lily x

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