Lost Loves, Forever In Our Hearts?
Did you ever have a love that got away, or think what might have happened if…? Someone who is perhaps still tucked away in a tiny corner of your heart.
Sometimes we fall in love for fleeting moments, and move on. Other times that person has the most incredible effect on our lives and things will never be the same. I would like to share my one-who-got-away, as he completely changed my life, and who I might have become.
It is hard to remember that just a few decades ago, class was what it was. I was from a poor (but very happy) family. He was not.
When I was 18 I took a temporary job working on a switchboard at a company in London. His father was a company director and he was manager of a department, at just 21. Every time I answered his calls he would always say something lovely or make me laugh, and before long I found myself falling head over heels.
I couldn't Believe It!
When he asked me out on a date, I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t care about his status or his wealth, he was just the kindest, loveliest man I had ever spoken to… and he wanted to take me out! This young girl from a council estate, who barely knew which fork to use, was about to have her entire life transformed.
At weekends he would pick me up on his motorbike and whisk me off to Knightsbridge, where we would go to Harrods and hang out in their fabulous boutique ‘Way In’. It was another world to me.
After we might walk down to a beautiful little alley called, Beauchamp Place, where he would buy handmade silk shirts (and often matching socks!). Then we would climb on the bike and speed across London to Hyde Park, and maybe have lunch in the little cafe overlooking The Serpentine, or take a boat out on the lake.
A Whole New World
He took me to my first West End show, concerts, festivals, book fairs, flower shows, art galleries. We ate in fabulous restaurants (The Ivy!). Never once did he make me feel inadequate, if I didn’t know something he always showed me what to do, in the most unassuming way.
He shared books with me that I would never have dreamt of reading, Tolstoy, Dostoevsky, Hesse, we listened to classical music. He taught me the value of study (I had left school with zero qualifications). I learned about the environment, politics, history, economics, a world so big I couldn’t imagine.
In the evening we would lie end to end on the sofa, reading books and listening to The Eagles or Genesis. Every so often I would look up and see him just gazing at me and my heart would skip a beat. Life was pretty perfect.
Would I Bring Shame?
His father, who I met daily at work, seemed to have no problem with us and was always lovely to me. His mother, however, was not so happy. His elder sister had become pregnant and, in her eyes, had bought shame on the family. So much so that they had sold their house and moved to a new area. I guess she didn’t want to risk a repeat of that shame with her son.
Although we were no longer together, our time had altered the whole course of my life. I had experienced so much, learned more than I could have imagined, and felt ready to change, what I had thought was, my destiny.
I started studying. First a Degree in Psychology, next a Diploma in Counselling and a Diploma in Mediation, followed by a qualification which would enable me to be a lecturer. Later, I studied so much more. It was a thrill to learn new things and, even now, I am still learning.
I worked hard, and saved hard. Soon I bought my first property, a little Victorian house in London, which I spent four years renovating to make it absolutely beautiful. I was the first person in my whole family to buy a house!
After about 20 years I started to write educational courses, imagine me a writer!! I left school without a single qualification. What would my old teachers say?
I am sure none of this would have happened if we hadn’t met, and I am grateful every day that I took a little temporary job answering phones in an office. A real sliding-doors moment for me.
ps. I met him once more, many years later. I was married and he was engaged, but there was still this wonderful connection between us. In the background a song came on ‘This Guys In Love With You’, our favourite song.
I hope that maybe I am in a little corner of his heart too.
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This article was first printed on sixtyandme.com
https://sixtyandme.com/lost-loves/
